Possibly women and children were totally expendable in this male-centered world. But a possible defense of those who abandoned their families is that Noah and his male followers hoped for exactly this solution. Perhaps there was some tradition of nonviolence against women that they hoped would come into play. It may be too far removed in time to have become precedent, but Nibley suggested that the pleading of Ishmael’s daughters for Nephi’s life was a recognized Near Eastern practice. It was a mechanism that apparently allowed men to find an acceptable way out of the conflict by acquiescing to the women’s desires. Perhaps some of this custom was retained. (See commentary accompanying 1 Nephi 7:17–19.) Even those men who remained with their families seized upon the expedient of having their women act as intermediaries, rather than proceeding straight to battle.
Mormon explains that the Lamanites were “charmed” by the beauty of the Nephite women. It is hard to understand how a marauding army would be so touched by beauty in whatever degree to the point of abandoning hostilities. Rather, it seems more probable that the women provided a cultural excuse under which a surrender might be negotiated. Given the desired outcome of Lamanite warfare, it is unlikely that they would have killed the men. What they wanted was capture, not only for the possession of captives, but the possession of the city over which they ruled. From this point on, Lehi-Nephi passed under Lamanite rule. Even though there had been a Gideon-led rebellion, it does not appear that the rebels were in sufficient control to claim to have deposed their government. The capture of the fleeing king accomplished the task of capturing the city.